05:05 | 22nd April 2019

Blogroll: Young and Proud

Mon 15 Feb, 2010.
by Sam Bristowe


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In true gay style we love to become friends with our ex’s. Something the straights seem to struggle to comprehend.

Friends with the Ex, “The Circle of Gay”

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You come home to that one person. You call them umpteen times a day. You confide in them with all your deepest darkest secrets. That person makes you lose all inhibitions, feel happy and proud.
Then one day it stops. It’s gone. You hurt as they shut the door on their way out.

Shutting the door on the relationship, shutting the door on you.

They are no longer your friend as it once started out. Nor are they your partner which they later turned out to be. They are your EX!

Within time, once the pain has stopped and the wounds have healed we play the typical game of ‘Circle of The Gays’ Like Elton John’s Lion King classic ‘Circle of Life’ we go full circle. That person who started out as your friend, then your lover and finally your ex. Is now your friend again.

In true gay style we love to become friends with our ex’s. Something the straights seem to struggle to comprehend. I don’t know the reason why we all love to do it. Maybe we love the drama? Is it because we are such a minority and must all stick together? Or even cause the community is so incestuous it is literally the case of ‘friends close and enemies even closer.’

To me it makes sense for none of those reasons. You have shared and grown so much with that person. They are a part of you and a builder of you. They know you inside and out. From what makes you smile to laugh and feeling content. Why wouldn’t you want someone like that back in your life? A person you invested so much time into and vice versa. Surely the large number of the straight community that don’t follow in foot can understand this. Hopefully they will in time. Fingers crossed at the same time good looking straight people realise that gay is in fact the way!
I have stayed friends with all my ex’s. No matter what impact they had or even how long or short we were together. Whether they were the best thing to happen to me or the worst – they are a piece of my jigsaw of life. As we all know there is nothing more infuriating then losing that one piece which makes the picture clearer. After all every piece add up to make you who you are to this day.

My best friend is my Ex and I wouldn’t have it any other way. He is my rock. Like scaffolding to building he is there to keep me standing tall, to support and protect. I don’t think he would be anywhere near as good if our past wasn’t our past. It’s thanks to those times he knows the real me and I know the real him.
Hopefully, as people start to understand; they will see that it is a good thing to keep this friendships founded. Because a friend is for life, not just for sex.


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